How to tell the difference between venting/chatting and gossip?

I try not to gossip as much as possible. But sometimes that really restricts what I feel comfortable saying to other people, ABOUT other people. Sometimes when my friend's talk to me they are telling me the bad/rude things their family/other friends have done or said, and I feel like they are gossiping. But is it really gossiping or are they just telling me about what's happening in their lives, or just needing to vent a little anger?

So how can I know the difference between just chatting or venting, and someone who is gossiping? Where is the line drawn?

I think there is a big difference between a person venting because they are trying to solve a problem, and a person who just likes complaining. I don't like gossip either, and when I hear people endlessly complain about others, I always wonder what they say about me when I'm not around. I think the difference is the intent. If they are venting not because they are trying to hurt or insult someone else, but to try to manage a problem/situation better themselves, that's fine, especially if they are discreet. So, if someone says, "Look I need some advice, my brother said xyz and it really upset me. Please don't discuss this with anyone, what do you think I should do?" is ok. If someone says "OMG my brother is such a f***ing idiot, guess what he did this morning, the douchebag - he'd DIE if he knew I was telling you this but..." in front of 6 people, with no concern as to whether they repeat it or not, that's gossip. That's fine for them, but with people like that, never tell them anything. They can't be trusted.

How to write a first birthday invitation in a cute way requesting books or shoes?

My daughters first birthday is coming up and we don't have any girly books because we had two boys before. Is there a cute poem or saying to ask people to include a book in their gift? I also had another cute idea I LOVE shoes and would love to start her collection. Same question what could I say to ask for shoes ? I just think it would be cute to share what people chose for her. Thanks for the help!!!

I sure hope you are keeping this guest list for your one year old to just very close relatives. To have a birthday party for a child this young, looks like a gift grab to your friends. So keep it very small and simple. She will have no idea or what is going on except to maybe like tearing the wrapping paper. To make any requests for gifts is completely improper and rude! You NEVER EVER ask for specific gifts---or any gifts at all. As someone else suggested, if anyone asks you what to give, then it is okay to say what she needs. Don't say what she wants, because she has no idea. So if anyone asks, just say you don't have any books especially for girls. Period. That's all. And why on earth would you want people to give her shoes? That is a ridiculous idea! Sorry! But she will grow out of them so fast and then what? Put them on a shelf to look at? I don't think so. If you want to start a collection of shoes, buy them yourself. So as for inviting other people besides your very close family, wait till she is older and will understand what is going on. Then ask just a few of her friends and their moms. Don't make it a huge thing. Children are overwhelmed by all the attention, and keeping it simple is the best way to go.

How to write a letter to a long dead relative?

I have to write a letter to my dead grandma. Please help me I don't know what to write about, and i've never met her before.

I would have thought that writing it would have been less of a problem than getting it delivered. I'm assuming this is a school homework task in which case you should probably think about what it is that your teacher is trying to get you to do and address that in your letter, you should probably also think about whether you are assuming that you would get a response or not which if not would make all of your questions rhetorical. I think a teacher may be asking you to ask some rhetorical questions in order to be introspective. Of course you could take it another way and just write a letter saying that you have nothing to say, that we have all come from somewhere and that while some people believe your family history defines you, that you are not of that opinion and that you feel that what and who are in existence in the present are what is important. Try imagining having a conversation with her but not as an old woman, imagine her as your age and your opening gambit is that you are breaking the news to her that you are her grandchild and would like to fill her in on what's happened since she was your age. May be you can imply how she feels (which roughly translates as how you feel to a teacher).

How to politely decline a room for rent from a landlord?

Hi there Peeps!

I'm looking for room or apartment to rent out. There is this one women who messaged me, but I'm not interested in the room. How do I politely let her know I'm not interested in it because she seems like she's really looking forward to me renting it out and I don't wanna be rude about it.

Thanks :)

Just say something like its not quite what I'm looking for or say you prefer something closer(or further) to downtown

How to tell someone they should only get a gift for one person in a joint party?

I'm combining my bday party with my friends that are twins. We both have neutral friends, then there's friends that I'm friends with but the twins aren't and then vice versa. How do I tell them even though it's a joint party I only want them to get a gift for just me or just the twins so they don't feel obligated to get us all a gift? Thanks.

I would advise you to make some kind of "costume" party ... or something with the style of Star Wars . For example people from your side are at the black side, and people from twin's side are "white side" ... and you issue small card ( invitation ) for such party ... where you mention that first , every side meets separatly to join in "beer fight" with laser swords :-)... something like this, but I guess you got the idea.

How to deal with drama that is impossible to avoid?

My wife and I have filed for legal custody of my son. Now my ex/son's mother is the drama queen, high mantience, always ready to yell and fight but doesn't wanna work type of chick, and her family is the exact same way. Me and my wife just aren't ready for the drama that's about to come along with all of this. Any advice on how to deal with these type of people?

Duck and cover. And don't get involved in petty bull shit. Stick to the facts, stick to the plan and avoid any unnecessary conversation or contact.

How to say in cover letter that it depends on the company how long they want me to stay as intern?

How do I say in my cover letter that It depends on them (company) how long do they want me to stay as an intern? Please help.

The company did not make any advertisement. I just found it as a prospect company.

I think the company already knows that.

How to prevent others extracting secret personal information from us.?

Whenever I talk or chat with them,they cunningly extract information from my mind,
Usually those information which shouldn't be shared to others.

Thanks :

It may sound silly when you state the situation so baldly, but I know exactly how you feel. I used to be in a club where one member really missed her calling. She should have been an investigative reporter. She could worm information out of anybody. Her technique was to spring a question on you in such a way that you found yourself spilling the beans before you even had a chance to realize that her nosy inquiry was way, way out of bounds. I made sure I stayed out of her orbit, and was vastly relieved when she lost interest in the club. My suggestion: Even if it kills you at first, adopt a slow, deliberate style of conversation. You'll find yourself being constantly interrupted, that's true, but you'll be able to hear yourself think. Have in your mind a few all-purpose evasive replies, ways to change the subject, and even a put-down or two, before you end up telling the world about your alcoholic uncle, your sister's messy divorce, or the most embarrassing thing that ever happened to you.

How to start a formal letter when the receiver's gender is unknown?

When writing formal letters, I always start with dear or respected sir or madam...Now is the situation that I don't know the gender, so please tell me how shall I address the receiver. Thank you.

Bluebell is correct, Dear Sir or Madam. If you work in the same organisation, you can begin, Dear Colleague. If you begin Dear Sir or Madam you finish with Yours sincerely.

How to refuse a hangout invitation politely?

I just started my first year in university, just met a guy in my computer science class, he`s pretty nice, but I barely know him at all. He's asked me on facebook chat if I wanted to hang out with him, and to be honest, I don't really want to or feel comfortable with this. The one class I have with him, I'm actually dropping (not because of him ofcourse, but for other academic reasons), so should I just ignore the invitation? How could I politely refuse?

Tell him u hav a bf....or tell him u wana concentrate on studies for the time being...or tell him that u don't kno him that well to hang out together ......or simply speak the truth but juz put in the right wordings :)

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